Fantasy Female Fan Desirability Index (FFDI)
The world of fantasy baseball is full of indices that guys have created to rank players in hopes of picking only the best players for their teams. Some of these indices make sense. Others are just ridiculous, but they seem to gain credibility over time, sometimes for no logical reason.
Because there’s something fun about jumping on a bandwagon, I’ve decided to create my own index – The Female Fan Desirability Index (FFDI). When combined with some of the more traditional baseball statistics (batting average RBIs, etc.), I think it has the chance of being a real predictor of success.
Not only have I created the index, but I’m actually going to use it as part of my fantasy player selection process this year, and I’ll keep you posted on the stats. The premise underlying the FFDI is that player confidence, passion, and happiness have much to do with the indicators of the FFDI and confidence, in particular, is closely linked to positive playing outcomes.
There are four components of the FFDI: Hotness, Relationship Status, Reputation, and Contract Size. The highest a player can score is 45; the lowest a player can score is 7. The higher the overall number, the more desirable the player is to female fans and the better he’ll play. It’s that simple.
There are a total of 20 points possible for Hotness, including up to 5 points for overall appearance, 5 points for athletic physique, 5 points for the size of his…uh…you know, and 5 points for the sexiness “it” factor, also known as the swoon factor. Here’s an example. Barry Zito would get a 15.5 hotness score. he’d get 4 for overall appearance (he’s cute, but there are cuter), 4 for athletic physique (he has an amazing yoga body, but that’s a level below some of the really fit guys out there), 2.5 for the size of his unit (you really can’t tell, which means it can’t be a 5, know what I mean? And since we have no evidence of a 1, we’ll just split the difference), and a 5 for the swoon factor (as measured by the crowds of women swooning and screaming, “Barryyyyy!”).
There are a total of 10 points possible for Marital/Relationship Status. This is a simple scale: Married multiple times, currently divorced, with kids – 1; Married multiple times, currently divorced, no kids – 2; Currently married, with kids – 3; Married once, divorced, with kids – 4; married once, divorced, no kids – 5; currently married, no kids – 6; Single, never married, with girlfriend and kids – 7; Single, never married, no girlfriend, with kids – 8; Single, never married, with girlfriend, no kids – 9; Single, never married, no girlfriend or kids – 10. Barry Zito would score 5 on the Marital/Relationship Status scale because he is currently married with no kids.
There are a total of 5 points for Reputation. Sleeps around like a dog with apparently no discretion or appearance of selectivity when choosing partners – 1; Sleeps around like a dog, but all his partners are gorgeous, and usually famous – 2; Has a reputation as a ladies’ man, but is discreet enough not to show up regularly in the tabloids – 3; No reputation in this area at all (or not much of one), a normal guy – 4; Squeaky clean, boy scout, hopelessly in love and doesn’t even watch the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show because he thinks it would be disrespectful (or something like that) – 5. Barry Zito would score 4 for Reputation.
The final category is Contract Size, which is worth a total of 10 points. Currently on a one year contract, less than $5 million – 1; Currently on a 1 year contract, $5 million or more – 2; On the back end of a multi-year contract, under $10 million per year – 3; On the front end of a multi-year contract, under than $10 million per year – 4; On the back end of a multi-year contract, over $10 million per year – 5; On the front end of a multi-year contract, over $10 million per year – 6; Bringing in at least $15 million from baseball this year plus at least $20 million in endorsements – 7; So friggin’ rich that the current contract doesn’t matter – 10. Barry Zito would score a 10 in this category.
Barry’s total FFID is 34.5 out of a possible 45 (.766). That’s good, but not great.
I’ll put up some FFID scores for other players soon. In the meantime, how does your favorite player score?
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